Sue and I have a very nice evening routine…regardless of the day we still take time to gather at 5 pm for happy hour and to catch up on some tv…that leads into dinner and then we watch some other things (currently catching up on Sons of Anarchy as well as other things we have DVR’d). That usually brings us to around 9 pm…at which point Sue heads to bed.

After she does that, I don’t find myself particularly tired, I’ve never needed a lot of sleep and now the slowdown of daily activity has made sleep not nearly as necessary. So I will stay up, scroll around, watch some sporting events depending upon the season, write, as I am doing now and still not get seemingly sleepy.

If you’ve been reading over the past few years, you know that I’ve expressed befuddlement (and yes, dismay) that I have far many more days behind me than ahead of me. I continue to struggle with that, and the latest “bout” happens each night as it gets quiet and still. My mind races around things like “is it possible that this might be the night I settle into sleep and don’t see the morning?”, “if I don’t wake up, who handles the dumb stupid day to day stuff that is simply part of my routine?”, “what about all the things I still want to do?” and on and on

Eventually, because I have nothing better to do, I will settle into bed, toss and turn for a while, eventually sleep, usually (according to my Apple watch) in various states of light, deep, REM, awake etc…I rarely feel rested in the morning, not tired, but not really refreshed. I think, if I had my druthers, I’d forego sleeping and simply relish the time left whatever that might be.

I guess in the still of tonight, my thoughts have run out. Back to listening to music…”Alexa, play….”